Wednesday, August 19, 2009

Why do you worry about his career when he is abusing you?

Disclaimer: If you are easily offended by certain words, stay away.

Why is it that so many women, married to Soldiers don't know their rights and what they are entitled to. Why is it that so many womens don't use the internet as a resource. If you have time on your hand google everything you need. Go talk to chaplains before it's to late. If you are more worried about your husbands career than your safety, even if he took your key and kicked you out of housing (WHICH HE CAN'T BECAUSE IT'S FOR THE SPOUSES AND DEPENDENTS AND NOT FOR THE SOLIDER) than you should have done some research beforehand.

I will never understand how a woman, an educated woman can take verbal abuse for months, gets literally kicked out of the apartment and know nothing about her rights and what she can and can't do.

It's goes beyond my comprehension.

However, if there is anyone out there being somewhat in the same situation here is what you need to do:

RATTLE THE FUCKING CAGES! If he doesn't take you seriously, takes your key away, tells you that this is his house and not yours... WRONG!

1. It is government property and not his.
2. He only got it because he is married to you.
3. The Servicemember is the one that has to move out because there are always barrackses available. They are not going to move you into a hotel. Housing is for dependents.

Give him a fucking wake up call.

It is not his housing. There are always barrackses available. So go to the PMO or call your husbands chain of command and they will give him a wake up call big time and make him move into the barracks. For your safety he is not allowed to contact you. I don't remember for how long but he has to turn in the key to you and can't come back for a certain amount of time.

So if he thinks he has control, verbally or physically abuses you don't take it. Don't be scared of his career because if he's going to get in trouble HE DID IT TO HIMSELF!

It is not your fault!
You didn't do anything wrong!
You are not guilty!

It is his fault and his fault only.
RATTLE THE CAGES!
Show him who is in the right and who is in the wrong.
Gather all the information you can ASAP!
And don't protect him, he is abusing YOU and you need to be protected!

HE DOES IT TO HIMSELF, IT IS NOT YOUR FAULT!

2 comments:

I'm just the MOM said...

Totally agree!! A girl I worked with went through the same thing. NO woman should subject herself to any kind of humiliating circumstance and say with a straight face "oh it just his job that stresses him out".

Anonymous said...

I have never understood why women put up with men like this. Wow. Especially if she is educated, why stay? I have heard many wives use the excuse that they would have no where to do, no job to get, etc. etc. But if you have your education, career, etc, then why stay? I am a Historian. I traveled a lot before I decided to settle down with a soldier. My husband knows that if he pulled ANYTHING, I would be OUT without hesitating. These women lack confidence and self-worth, and men/husbands can SENSE that and pull shit like this because they know she'll take it. That's so sad.

Im glad you are posting something like this to help other women out there. Great post!